Tuesday 31 January 2012

Oh really?

Lochlan and Richard were playing yesterday, and Richard came into the kitchen to get a drink.

Lochlan comes running up, and hands Richard an imaginary jellybean, and says 'here you go Daddy, this is for when you get low'.

(For those unaware, Lochlan has Type 1 diabetes, and we always have jellybeans on hand to boost his levels should they drop low - hypoglycaemia)

Richard says thank you to Lochlan, and then mutters something under his breath.

Knowing that I might regret it, I ask what he just said.

"I said, the lowest I ever got was marrying your mother."

I told him he was going home with a friend that was due to visit later that day.

Thursday 26 January 2012

So, I'm salad now am I?

Richard was feeling... amorous tonight.

Drags me into the bedroom. (Relax, this is going to stay G-rated, I promise)

He says - You have two options.

You can have the first nap. (we've been doing 3 am readings on Lochlan for nearly two months now, one of us stays up one night, the other the next.)

Or, you can be radished.

Radished? WTF?

His reply -

It's like being ravished, but hotter.


I'm choosing the nap! LOL

Alright, alright, I know I'm slack.

Not mentioning any names or anything. (JIM)

Ok, you'll need a bit of background for this post. We used to own a Lexus, which was a very very dark green. However, Richard always called it black. This caused many arguments with us. He'd normally be talking to someone, mention the car, then say 'it's black.' To which I used to reply 'GREEN'. 'Ah, whatever.' was the reply I would get.

Anyway, fast forward a few years to tonight. (Also, this is a Lochlan comment tonight. But I guess it shows what my life is going to be like!)

We're sitting at the gas station, waiting for Richard to pay for the gas. Lochlan is curious, (as are all three year olds, I guess), and has previously asked why we use the red gas, and not the black or the green. The only way I could think of explaining it to him (he was nearly 3 at the time) was to say that the black gas would make the car sick if we put it in. I told him we could use the green, but the red is the best for our car.

So we're sitting there tonight, and he says our car is black. It's not, it's green. (My thoughts - you've got to be bloody kidding me, not version 2.0 of this argument). He's adamant it is black. I kept saying, no , it's green. So I told him about the other car we used to own, how Daddy always said it was black, when in fact it was green.

Richard gets back in the car, we're still arguing, so I had to explain it to Richard. He turns around and says to Lochlan that they'll make up a new name for the colour on the car, and they'll call it 'Richard Black'.

Lochlan came out with a beaut of a reply.

'No Daddy, it's RICHARD GRAY!'

What can you say to that?